See the introduction to the Tchaik Project here!
August 20th, 2019 - Tuesday
Before opening the violin case I’m already gasping. We think anxiety comes only when we are performing? In my case it is already present even before I start practicing. I just posted the video introducing the TCHAIK PROJECT in Portuguese, and the exposition of the vulnerabilities of my journey as a violinist makes me tense. But when we go on stage isn’t it what we do? We expose all we have, everything we are, and the more we put ourselves into what we are playing, the more what the audience hears is the music.
Good process for us! =)
I had 15 minutes to practice. I did:
- Body warm up (a set of exercises my physiotherapist recommended for my body, plus some of the exercises in this video, plus other two I learned elsewhere. This is mostly to wake up my muscles and specially my joints. It makes a lot of difference for me and I do them even before rehearsals and concerts.)
Random practice (Read. This. Article. Changed my life and my practice.)
- Open strings, 12 beats at 60 bpm in each string
- Vibrato (without the bow, an exercise I literally INVENTED)
- Schradieck in the way Nicola Benedetti talked about in this video - I. exercise 11 on the D string
- A major scale in 2, 3 and 4 octaves in forte
Time to go to work! (there I was all tense, pain in my right shoulder, didn’t play since last Thursday…)
August 21st, 2019 - Wednesday
Paralyzing anxiety crisis? I’ve got only one hour to practice. How about some scales?
I kept organizing my phone, erasing photos to leave space for the videos, master of procrastination…
Half an hour left. I did:
- Body warm up
Random practice
- 1’ bows on A and E strings (I love this exercise, gives me big sound without squeezing)
- Vibrato (without the bow)
- Cycle of 1 octave scales in one string, on A and E strings (I pick a scale that has something to do with my current repertoire, or with a shift that I want to practice. I do major and minor scales, arpeggios, chromatic scales, scales in major and minor alternating thirds)
This was half of the technique random practice. I already practiced 15 minutes more than yesterday. =/
August 22nd, 2019 - Thursday
The day that I posted the Introduction to the Tchaik Project in English.
- Body warm up
- Cycle 1234 (An Alexander Technique exercise for both body and mind that I learned with Eleni Vosniadou during a class in the University of São Paulo, the class was called something like “Techniques for reducing the Performance Anxiety”)
Random (30’)
- 1’ bows on D and G, to complete yesterday’s practice
- Vibrato (with the bow)
- Shifting positions, the exercise Dora Schwarzberg taught me - 4th finger on G string (D major, departing from 1st position)
- 4, 6 and 8 notes per beat with metronome at 60, on the 4 open strings in the middle of the bow. To each string, 1 minute. Paying attention to the quality of sound and my body, looking for the minimum action necessary from the muscles, specially in the right scapula area.
(15’)
- Trills with 1st finger, 1 whole tone
- Cycle of 1 octave scales on the D string (chose the G major starting on the 2nd position, because I know there is something similar on the Tchaikovsky.)
Time to go to work. It is still veeeery little practice, but it is getting better.
August 24th, 2019 - Saturday
I’m still in the anxiety crisis… I commented about this with a few colleagues and ALL of them told me to write about it, apparently it is something relevant for everyone. Yes, I am nervous. This project is important to me and the exposition takes me COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone.
And also my violin teacher Adrian Pinzaru (assistant of Dora Schwarzberg when I studied in Italy) responded to my video saying he will give me feedback and that he liked the idea of this project. That makes me feel at the same time nervous and embraced. Isn’t it crazy? Thank you, Adrian! =)
I have a little less than 2 hours to practice now. I have a hot water bag to warm my hands, it’s cold here (no heating system in this part of the planet). I’ll start soon. The plan is to warm up, do some technique and then read a piece of the Concerto recording and saying what I am feeling in each part.
- Body warm up
- Cycle 1234
Random
- 1’ bow on the 4 strings
- Vibrato (with the bow)
- Shifting positions - 1st finger on D string (G major, starting on 3rd position)
- Trills of whole tons on the A string with fingers 2, 3 and 4
READING AND RECORDING THE TCHAIKOVSKY, 1st MOVEMENT!!!!
Almost one hour. I started from the beginning. The things I couldn’t just play (almost everything) I was sort of reading, sort of unveiling, a little bit already practicing and thinking how to practice that afterwards. A LOT OF TENSION ON MY LEFT SHOULDER, OMG!!! This shows how what is recorded in my body is 99% preoccupation with this side. The right thumb is also a little sore, but there is no comparison!!! I didn’t finish the 1st movement, I stopped at the beginning of the recap.
I read with a score recently printed from the IMSLP website. I don’t remember any of the old fingerings, which is very good, it means they didn’t get fixed in me - and then I think other things didn’t fix as well. I could feel my body loosing by itself, I remembered to loosen up my hips. During this re-reading I saw that somehow the 2 information - the old from the Tchaikovsky I practiced 10 years ago, and the new, from the new ways I’ve been practicing - got mixed. This is excellent news! I have to be careful not to think that it is all ready, and keep opting for this new way of playing, which means to perceive my own body and act together with it, not in spite of it. It was nice to see my head already looking for ways to practice.
Something that was really nice is that the 2 parts of the first movement that I remember to be the worst for me - the middle section and the one in triplets with sixths and fifths in high positions - were not so horrible, the double stops were a lot less difficult than before! And I could pay attention to the bow, to see if I was not squeezing too much, because I believe I won’t need so much pressure up there. Maybe this is going to be a lot easier to play than I thought. Yes, I do have to practice a lot because the left hand, when in such high positions, gets out of tune really easily. But knowing I might not have to press so hard on the bow (the length of the string gets a lot smaller in those high positions), and knowing the 2 hands always communicate, the right hand could help the left hand to go easier. This is cool, I got excited. But there is still a LOT of tension.
 |
| The part with double stops, fifths and sixths in high positions |
I went to the orchestra concert. Shoulders and neck were rigid and sore, it took a long time to feel better.
August 25th, 2019 - Sunday
- Body warm up
- Major scales in 2 octaves in fixed position and correspondent arpeggio (as suggested by Rachel Barton Pine in this interview)
- Reading of the rest of 1st movement
I have the impression it’s going to happen. But yes, I finished this reading with rigid neck and shoulders.
OH BOY, I’LL HAVE TO MEMORIZE THIS CONCERTO!!!! So many pages of non-stop music!!!
August 26th, 2019 - Monday
A consideration: I am still anxious. A strong anxiety crisis took place when I posted the first video of this project, introducing it to you. For 4 days I could not open the Concerto score to read. When I finally began and saw that I was not starting from where I left 10 years ago, another feeling appeared, something similar to confidence. The anxiety continues, but after I began it cheered me up, and I kept reading in the following days. If everything goes well, tomorrow I read the 3rd movement. To observe these feelings reminds me of an important conclusion I got to a while ago and sometimes I forget: I don’t need to feel good to start practicing, practicing makes me feel good.
It’s cold. I was doing the 1’ bows together with other exercises in the random practice, but when I come back from 1’ bow to the left hand exercises, my left hand is cold again. So I’m doing this another way. I’ll do the 1’ bow all at once and then I’ll go to the random practice with left hand exercises. This way it keeps moving and doesn’t get cold.
- Body warm up
- 1’ bows (30’)
Random (30’)
- Vibrato (with bow)
- Shifting on D string, starting with 2nd finger on A, 3rd position
- Trills of whole tone on E string, 3rd position
RECORDING OF THE 2nd MOVEMENT!
Yes, I was tense…
August 27th, 2019 - Tuesday
Here we are again, me and my anxiety. “Oh my, Helena, are you still anxious?” Yes… because after finishing today’s reading of the 3rd movement, I begin to practice for real this Concerto and there will be public videos. “Aren’t you posting the videos of your reading?” No, no one deserves to hear that, guys.
- Body warm up
- Open string in staccato on the 4 strings
- Minor 2 octave scales with correspondent arpeggio in fixed position (left shoulder already rigid) (15’)
I read the 3rd movement and recorded it. I have no memory of practicing this movement, I confess. Maybe I read and practiced it very little 10 years ago. Today I felt my body loosening up a lot less than the previous days. Is it because I’m tired? Is it because I practiced almost no specific technique today? Well, in this one I felt a lot of tension too. Lots of tricky sequences of 16ths. My left ears is very sensitive and with a strong buzz when I play loud, some notes more than others. This one might give me more trouble than I thought.
The plan for tomorrow is to listen to the recordings of the 1st movement and see if I can elaborate a plan of practice.
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The Tchaik Project is part of the Master’s Degree Research of Helena Piccazio, enrolled in the Master’s Program in Music at the School of Communication and Arts of the University of São Paulo (ECA-USP).
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